I know all the normal ways of doing this, what I'm looking for is an article I read a long long time ago that showed how to write some crazy helper functions using inline assembly and __naked functions to return a pair of items. I've tried googling for it endlessly, but to no avail, I'm hoping someone else knows the article I'm talking about and has a link to it.
StackOverflow isn't, in general, a search service. This is a very localized request -- that is -- you're asking for an article, not really help on programming, so I'm voting to close this as localized.